Conflict Coaching
Conflict is a natural and expected part of working in community. When approached constructively, it can strengthen trust, deepen understanding, and create opportunities for growth. This site offers practical tools within your locus of control to build self-awareness, strengthen communication skills, and use resources appropriately to help create a psychologically safe, healthy workplace.
Conflict management begins with self-awareness. Use these tools and guiding questions to better understand your own triggers, tendencies, and strengths before attempting to assess or address a situation.
For Individuals
Ask Yourself:
- Have I acted in a way that I want others to experience me?
- Am I creating space for conversation with the people I work with?
- Do I have the skills/confidence to address this directly with the other party?
- What info am I missing? Who might know more?
- What are the people/relationship/behavior aspects of this situation?
- What are the process/operational/structural aspects of this situation?
- What have I already tried to keep this from escalating?
- What is within the locus of my control?
- Is there anything that needs to be raised to my supervisor/HR?
- What would a successful outcome look like for me?
- How could I use this moment to rebuild trust/reset expectations with another party?
For Leaders
Ask Yourself:
- What is my conflict style?
- What are things I tend to avoid when navigating conflict?
- What is my previous experience with conflict resolution?
- What is my current comfort level with managing conflict?
Explore Context:
- Have I clearly defined roles, priorities, and boundaries for my team?
- Have I modeled the behaviors I’m asking them to use?
- Am I creating regular spaces for honest (or any) conversation?
- Is there alignment between my intention and impact?
- Do team members have the skills and psychological safety necessary to resolve this amongst themselves?
Identify the Core Issue:
- What don’t I know about the situation? Who might have more insight?
- What are the people/relationship/behavior aspects of this situation?
- What are the process/operational/structural aspects of this situation?
Consider Roles:
- What, if anything, has already been done in an effort to de-escalate this situation?
- What is in the locus of my control?
- Is there a potential policy violation that needs to be reported?
Assess Options:
- What approaches can I use that align with GVSU goals, leadership expectations, employee core competencies, etc.?
- What does resolution look like?
- How can I use this moment to strengthen trust and/or reset norms?
Resources
CliftonStrengths
Understanding your strengths can improve communication, teamwork, and how you respond to stress. It also helps you recognize how your style may differ from others.
SCARF Model
Conflict often grows from perceived threats related to status, fairness, control, or belonging. The SCARF Model helps you understand reactions and reduce defensiveness.
Conflict Styles
People handle conflict in different ways. Knowing your conflict style can help you respond more effectively and work through disagreements productively.
- Video: Thomas Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument, Psychologysketchbook
- Video: Conflict Resolution in the Workplace: 5 Strategies, Business: Explained
- The Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Model Explained, Bite Size Learning
- Conflict Management with Emotional Intelligence, Udemy
- Conflict Management Style Self-Assessment, University of North Florida
Many conflicts can be prevented or resolved early with the right skills. Explore practical communication strategies that help you listen effectively, respond thoughtfully, and de-escalate tension in the moment.
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Prevention & De-Escalation Tool |
What It Is |
Resources |
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Psychological Safety |
Psychological safety is the shared belief that people can speak up, ask questions, share ideas, and raise concerns without fear of embarrassment or retaliation. Teams with psychological safety are better able to address tension early, learn from mistakes, and engage in honest, respectful dialogue. |
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Feedback |
Many conflicts escalate when people feel unheard or when concerns go unspoken. A culture of clear, honest, and timely feedback—supported by strong listening skills—improves understanding, reduces tension, and supports better conversations. |
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Restorative Communication |
Restorative communication helps address issues while preserving respect and relationships. It focuses on accountability, empathy, and collaborative problem-solving. |
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Acknowledgement & Repair |
When impact has occurred, acknowledgement and repair can rebuild trust. A sincere apology and accountability often help move conflict toward resolution. |
When a situation extends beyond what can be resolved directly, additional support may be needed. This section connects you to resources, reporting options, and formal processes to ensure concerns are addressed appropriately and effectively.